I'm writing this post to really process out my recent trip to Haiti, kind of like I did for Costa Rica. To do that though, I probably need to back up and explain a few things so my processing will make since.
It's been three years since I returned from Costa Rica, three years since Jack and I got engaged and started the already longtime process to us finally getting married. You see, Costa Rica gave me a perspective and confidence in myself that honestly has helped push me through the past three years. It prepared me for trusting God when He moves your wedding last minute, and then moves you multiple states away from the only world you've ever known. Costa Rica helped me realize that I should be content with my one room hotel that doubled as Jack and I's long term "honeymoon suite". It helped me to realize I could make a life in Missouri that was flourishing, just like we did in Costa Rica (minus the freakishly huge beetles). And with a loving husband and God, we did just that. I'm not gonna lie, those first two weeks after the whirlwind of graduation, leaving Auburn, marriage, moving out of my parent's house, and ending up in a new state with no one but a husband that had to work all the time was not my favorite season. But thanks to my Army ID Card and friend date to Walmart, I was ready to start settling and enjoying the experience that is uniquely the military's. And man did God bless me through that. He gave me an amazing group of Godly, fun girls to pour into and be poured into. From that, I look back with nothing but fondness on my time spent there.
But you see, I've noticed a pattern in my life and walk with God. God graciously gives me a wonderful first experience in almost everything I have done. Then, for His reasoning alone, and much to my dislike sometimes, He really challenges me the second time. It usually isn't all that fun for me honestly. I don't even know when I discovered this pattern in my life, but it's there. Am I bitter about it, no. I know He does it for a reason and it usually ends up teaching me more about myself and my faith.
Anywho, so fast forward to our move to the good ole' Ludowici, Georgia. I came in prepared for a harder journey, and I wasn't disappointed. It took Jack and I awhile to really make this place feel like home. Honestly, we are still in that journey. We both know that our hearts are in Alabama because we both feel like that is where God ultimately wants us. We don't know though, when He wants us there, and what He has prepared for us until that time comes. This whole grown up "you get to call the shots" thing is a little overwhelming sometimes. You battle with what you want, and ultimately what God wants for you… But we have been able to settle here, in a house that feels like a home to us. We were able to buy the dog I googled and pinned about a million times before I finally talked Jack into it, the cutest and best dog ever I might add. I was also fortunate enough to begin doing part of the plan God has for me, teaching. First it came in the form of Sunday School at our church, Consumed. It took us a while to find a church that felt like home, with a community that we felt we could really dive into. When we did finally find it, thanks to a dear friend named Kellie, we both wanted to drive in head first. It's something we are still doing, and honestly it's one of my favorite things we do as a couple. We plan the lesson, some better then others, but then I get watch my husband teaching twenty plus kiddos along side me. A good monthly reminder of how lucky I am to have married such an amazing man. Back to the long winded story though, almost at the same time as starting Sunday School teaching, I got the opportunity to work at a local elementary school. It was a temporary full time job to help some struggling third graders get ready for their state test. I loved it. I loved the school, coworkers, and especially the students. There is something so rewarding about teaching kiddos. You get to talk to them about whatever is on their little minds, mentor them, love on them, and hopefully send them on at the end of the year better off then when you first met them.
Fast forward again, to the end of my first full year as a "real" teacher in third grade. Potentially the most challenging, draining, and rewarding year of my life. I asked myself at the end of the year how would I ever have room in my heart for so many kiddos after twenty-four plus more years of this… They just steal your heart, even the ones that drive you crazy some days. As the year ended, and I prepared to change grades, classrooms, and maybe even relax a little bit, I started really setting my mind to our upcoming mission trip to Haiti. (Yes, I'm finally getting there)
So this was my second big foreign mission trip. I knew going into it that it wouldn't be as easy, just like all my other seconds. I was excited though, that I would be going with Jack. We went with a team of 14, counting us and an awesome lady that was going to spend her whole summer there.
When we got there, we took a bus to the campus we would be living at. I looked around, but honestly tried to just breath and keep my head in the wind, because the driving made me a little bit car sick. They don't really believe in lanes, speed limits, really safety in general… Somewhat like Costa Rica, but even worse. I did notice though that the land was so barren. Dirt was everywhere, mixed in with a few shrubs and lots of blue/tin huts that people, families, lived in. I remember Jack saying that that I looked like a scene from the Bible, men riding donkeys through bare land, herding goats. Goats there were like dogs and cats here. They are everywhere, used for garbage control, food, and land maintenance.
Goats… this is the school property where we spent most of our week… more about that later.
The campus is called Mission of Hope, they are an organization that is really trying to give the people of Haiti what THEY need, not what Americans think Haitians need, which I think is a really cool thing. They run an orphanage, school, health clinic, church, and daily mission work for visitors like us. Saturday we were able to get settled and orientated to the campus. Jack and I spent the first little bit cleaning most of our stuff because a glass jar of jelly exploded in one of our bags. We also added an extra member to our group, that came from Atlanta, GA. She had bravely decided to come, all on her own and joined our motley crew. It's always fun to see who all God puts on a team. We had a great group of people, some quiet, some not so quiet, some leaders, some "tell me what to do's", a little bit of everything was represented. I really enjoyed getting to know each of them better.
This is the building we lived in while there.
Sunday, we got to explore the campus with tours and a church service. Mission of Hope is really doing some cool things, I'd encourage you to check them out for yourselves to read all about it. The short story though is that a couple came to Haiti and had to watch a little baby girl die because of hunger. They tried to get her to a hospital, but when they finally got there it was closed and the baby girl died in her dad's arms. It spurred them to start this organization, and even to adopt two Haitians as their own. What it has led to, is a place where people can come for an education, church service, and health services that include prosthetics. They also have a warehouse that serves thousands upon thousands of children daily. The idea for meals came from their desire to start a school for the children. The children were passing out at the school because they were so famined. After they started feeding the children, they were able to see a drastic change in the children's capacity to learn, let alone their physical health. Pretty crazy to compare that to our school's here in America, it also makes you wonder if some of my kids aren't just hungry… maybe to actual food, maybe just for love and attention… either way I'm suppose to be supporting them, with their community too.
The church on MOH property
That was the cool thing about Haiti, they live in daily community, which segways very well into Monday. We found out Sunday night that the village we sponsor, Turpin, was going through mourning. Saturday night, the night we arrived, they lost their village champion. Each village sponsored by Mission of Hope has two to four village champions. These champions are from the community, they are leaders in their community, and they work with MOH to get things done that need fixing in their community. The one that passed away from our village was the elder champion. He taught school and was raising his six daughters. It shifted our gears for the week. We spent Monday painting a house for a family that lived way, way, way, up the mountain. Now when I say mountain, I mean we rode in the back of an open truck. We sat on metal benches and bounced around for over an hour as our driver drove up a never ending mountain. At one point, I almost went overboard when we crossed a decent sized creek, but back to the story… They do a lot of painting there because the houses are just concrete blocks and woods. A lack of resources and the earthquake damage has left most familes in a tiny tent. The ones that are able to, have a concrete and wood house. MOH is helping the community "add some color" by painting the concrete houses. It was a fun day filled with kindergarten level Haitian Creole, backwoods bathrooms experiences I would never like to repeat, and lots and lots of paint.
This is the Canter we rode every day up the hill.
On Tuesday we geared back up for our mountain ride. This time we all carried blankets to wrap up in, and pillows to sit on. (Remember the dust I talked about, its everywhere, especially in your eyes, nose, and mouth as you ride up the mountain.) When we got there the village champion we were paired with took us to visit the family of the village champion that passed away. As we walked up, there were people everywhere. Standing up, sitting down, walking around… but several of them were wailing. There mourning process is so different from ours. We've been taught to be so stoic in our emotions, where as these people are just the opposite. They fall down crying, wailing, wanting everyone to know that they are upset and sad. After acclimating to our surroundings we found the six daughters that were now without that father or mother (their mother had already died a couple of years ago). The oldest daughter was 18 and the youngest was able to walk, but still wanted to be carried. As we talked to them, we discovered that they were just really confused on what to do next. Without any parents and income, they weren't sure what would happen. We spent some time praying for them, and while I prayed I got pretty choked up. It was honestly heartbreaking. I can't imagine what they were going through… While I was praying though, three white doves flew overhead. I thought it was a very appropriate moment. We spent the rest of the morning with the family and friends. They wanted us to sit with them, so we did. It was pretty awkward at first, not being able to speak in their language… but it was nice. Some of our group decided to take the time to learn some more Haitian which was pretty entertaining to watch. After that we traveled around to different places to talk to other people in the village. We stopped by a house where a grandmother was washing her grand baby boy in a small bucket of water. We stopped at our village champion's mother's house to pray over her recent bad health. It was nice to get to meet the community and pray for them and their needs. Next, we ate lunch. Our everyday lunch included PB & J, Pringles, and some type of cookie. We would eat on the truck or in a building, removed from the community. MOH is big on not giving out handouts, food or otherwise. They want to empower the people, not make them dependent on Americans. It seems harsh sometimes, especially when little kiddos are watching and asking for food, but you of the big goal, and you know the kids get a good lunch at school… When we finished lunch Jack and I went out to the porch together and played drums with gallon buckets with a group of boys. It honestly was one of the only moments we had together all week for different reasons. We spent the afternoon at the school/church. It's basically a time to play with the local kids, but because of the mourning we didn't have very many kids, maybe 10 that hung out with us. Half of them played soccer with Jack and the other guys (brutally I might add), while the other half went from person to person playing hand games, frisbee, or their personal favorite taking photos with people's phones. I kind of watched it all for a little while, just taking it in. It is such a different atmosphere from the school I spent my whole year working in. They were very similar to the Costa Rica schools, just minus the lush greenery. Then, I let one of the older boys play with my phone. You have to be really careful, these kids are tough… they don't wear shoes and they walk on rocks like it sand, and their general lives are a lot rougher then ours. Some of them (not all) aren't afraid to take advantage of you and your belongings. This boy though seemed like he was at that age where he was about to have to decide what kind of person he wanted to be. I let him take photos and videos as much as he wanted, and then he stood up and walked off with my phone. My instinct was to snatch it back, but I decided to see what would happen. (I also knew my husband was there and could get it back easily if necessary). He walked it around and took photos with his friends with it, but I noticed he didn't let his friends take it when they tried. He brought it back to me and said "thanks". I was really proud of that young man for such a small, silly reason.
The small lady in the picture meet our group the previous year and took a picture with them then. She left us to go get dressed up for this picture. At the bottom are our interpreters and village champion too.
Wednesday, let's call this Wacky Wednesday. Our church and others had bought trees to be planted in Turpin, and we were the manual labor to plant them. In our silly American minds we were going to go out to field and plant the trees in rows, all 40 of them. We would each have a task and a job, the trees would be laid out where they should go… not so much. It's funny how we think of things. We all expected some form of that… instead we got the supplies and went to stand in a fieldish place. Lack of communication made for a long and slow start. We were all standing around trying to get it organized. Our village champion's plan for the day was to get a few trees and walk around to see where we should put them. He would holler around to the neighbors and ask "Want a tree?" If they did, they would come get a pick axe and show him where to put them. Sometimes it was in the corner of their property, mostly it was in the middle of corn fields, or in the most random spots possible… like I said, a little different from American ways. It went slow enough that we had to take turns working because there just wasn't enough jobs for all of us. Some of us would stand by the stuff, play with kids, or take pictures instead. For someone who is as Type A organized as I am, it was kind of frustrating honestly when we started. I didn't want to just stand around all day… I wanted to execute a good plan and get it done. But, you had to realize that they aren't American, they don't do things the same way we do… they can actually relax and just do something without a ten step plan, interesting huh? It was fun to watch Jack that day, he really went after it with the jobs and the people. He isn't afraid to mess with them or discipline the kids when they got out of hand. It's fun to watch and think, "Yeah... that's my man." :) The other interesting thing from this day was that I started to get a….. RASH, AGAIN?! I was really thinking that was a one time thing in Costa Rica, but no, evidently I am allergic to foreign places…
Jack with one of his new friends
Thursday was our last day going up to Turpin. I really took the time to look around at the view during our drive. It honestly looks like a real life setting for the story the Lorax. You can tell its suppose to be a beautiful place, will huge mountains and a beautiful blue sea, the only thing missing is the trees and topsoil. Years of using one of their only natural resources has left them without many. The ones that are left are small and skinny. When you do see one that if big and round, you notice it stands out because it's the only one around. It made me think that this is what Costa Rica could become if people don't use their natural resources wisely. But even without the trees and soil… it was still beautiful in it's own way. There's this song that I kept singing while we were there that really described Haiti. The lyrics to the chorus are below:
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us
So fitting, that God can make beautiful things out of the dust and out of us. On that last day we drove up to the school/church and found a ton of people wailing, crying, standing around for the village champion's funeral. You could see people walking from everywhere to come to this man's funeral. He really had impacted so many lives and families, it was really cool to see. We weren't dressed for a funeral, especially since we were covered in the dust from our ride. So we rode down a way to meet some people in the village that weren't going to the funeral. We got to play with some kiddos and just kind of hang out while the village had the funeral. After the funeral, we went to eat lunch in a church. I remember telling someone next to me that you would have to be really dedicated to come to church in Haiti. Most people have to pay a large part of their salary to ride to church, then they come to a building that isn't air conditioned. Just sitting in there for the hour we ate lunch, we were all sweating and ready for a breeze. It makes you wonder who would show up in America at our churches if they were the same. Who would want that community and time to worship, so bad that they wouldn't mind sacrificing their financial and physical comfort for a few hours? Would you go? Something to think about… After lunch we went back to the school and played with the kiddos that were around. Some played soccer, painted nails, threw frisbees, our just sat around. I painted some nails, laughed with some kiddos, watched Jack and the others get smashed in soccer, and talked to several people on our team. One of the neat things about trips like these is that you get to know people from your own church on another level. I really enjoyed getting to talk about their lives, thoughts, and struggles. As our time was coming to an end Jack came over to rehydrate and relax for a little bit. He was immediately covered in four or five little boys that wanted his attention. He was teaching them how to play tic-tac-toe and they were teaching him how to write their names. I get to see Jack work with kids a lot through our church, but this trip even more made me think about what an amazing dad he will be one day. That night we started the process of packing back up and thinking about going home…
One of the cuties that wanted a her picture with my phone
Jack's the one in the silly looking hat :)
Jack hanging out with the boys and learning their names in written Haitian.
Friday morning we got up an ready for our beach day. Each group that comes ends their week by spending the day at a local beach resort. It's a time to relax, process, and just enjoy Haiti. The water was so clear and beautiful. The beach was literally a walk right in from the stairs with little cabanas in the water. We got cooled off for awhile floating around, and then a group of us decided to go snorkeling. Someone talked our village champion into going with us which was really cool. He had had a really tough week, dealing with the other village champion's death, taking care of us, and thinking about stepping into the head village champion role now… it had to be a stressful week. So we were really excited about him getting to come and relax. He ended up coming out with us snorkeling. He said he couldn't swim, but he would ride out there with us. We got out and swam around the coral, it was pretty to see the fish swimming around and the multitude of sea urchins that kept popping up around our feet. The boat driver though got our village champion to get in with a life jacket. In Haitian, he taught him how to doggie paddle and move around. Then someone gave him their goggles so he could look down at the fish and coral. Man, I don't think I have seen a grown man smile that big in my life. He looked like a little kid on Christmas morning. He was loving it. When we got back he spent the rest of the day watching soccer on TV, drinking smoothies :). If nothing else, we felt like we had given him a day he deserved, a day to just have fun and relax. It was a really nice day to just enjoy Haiti and our team.
All in all, it was a great trip. It was definitely not was I was suspecting to experience with the mourning process and such, but it was interesting to be a part of all that. So finally to the part about what did I learn from this trip…what thoughts and changes did I make in my mind, heart, etc.?
I think I took a more realistic view of the world on this trip. I had already seen poverty in Costa Rica so I wasn't shocked to see it in Haiti. That doesn't mean it wasn't sad to see, but I had already had the "Wow, we have so much STUFF when they have nothing" conversation with myself. I looked at the kids a little differently too. They are precious and so fun, but still kids. In Costa Rica I probably let them get away with more then I should have, because I didn't know any better. But in reality, they are still kids that need to know what is okay and what isn't okay (in a loving way). Mostly though, I thought about my kids… the ones I spend most of my year and time with. Am I doing the best I can do with the time I have? There is so much they need to learn and see besides just addition, subtraction, stars, habitats, etc. They need to know about the world, and what life is like for others. They need to know that they can make a difference, starting now, in their community, family, and school. And they need to know that they can have fun while doing it. And I need to be the one facilitating that attitude and mindset in those kiddos. They challenged us one night during a message from one of the full time employees. They said that we had sent time this week with our village champion, this person that we had all come to really respect and look up to. Someone we knew was giving it all to making their community a better place. They challenged us to be that person in our own community back home. I thought about it and really I am set up well to be one already in my daily job. It's just getting that mindset daily about what your purpose it day, tomorrow, and every day after that. It's so easy to get in a routine where there is no time for a refill on God's purpose for you today. It's those days this past year, that I felt the least effective. I think it's just as simple as starting out each day by asking God, "What do you want me to do today?" "How can I serve you and others?" And if we can do that one simple thing, it can effect people in a life changing way.
So that's the main take away from this trip. And honestly, I didn't even have to go to Haiti to know it. But seeing our village champion pour himself out daily for his community and family, was really a challenge to myself of my attitude in serving, my effort in serving, and my spirit in serving.
